The effects of divorce on children
1. Children Trust is broken:
Children always carry with them a broken heart where ever they go that will affect them emotionally, psychologically, and socially, spiritually and many more. They would not be able to see the world with love as they used but with the eyes of hatred and bitterness since that is what they learn from their parents.
Most of the things we show to our children, they behave and act according to how we behave. They tend to imitate what we do in the real world.
If we are showing them to break a covenant that we make with our spouse, they tend to do the same thing unless the power of the Lord interferes in their life.
There is one basic question that all children whose parents are divorced have in common.
They always ask this question: “Why mom and dad couldn’t save the marriage at least for me?” They also ask, “Why they didn’t fight for me and save the marriage if they love me?”
These are few of the questions children with broken family relationships ask themselves and their parents? Well, if we decided to go to path of divorce, we must prepare ourselves to face the truth like this.
The issue here is trust. Children love to trust their parents. Even if you have a good reason to divorce your spouse, they couldn’t understand you until they reach to their maturity. And before they reach at the level of maturity, devil will take every chance to break them in to pieces and it is already too late by the time they reach to their maturity.
For that reason, it absolutely necessary to protect the trust our children on us since it is the most valuable asset we could possibly get from our children.
2. Sexual/Physical Abuse:
The chance of children getting sexually or physically harassed and abused by an outsider is huge compared to if the parents are not divorced at all.
This is because the chance of the children tend to respect and love their parents get very law and children would fall on the hands of the perpetrator easily.
Criminals get the opportunity to abuse children when parents are not able to easily manage and control the activities of their children.
If parents can’t manage their relationship with their spouses, it is absolutely difficult to manage their children. Therefore children fall on the hands of criminals who promise them to show love that they are deprived of from their parents.
The other thing is children get abused by their step parent while they are under one parent custody. This is again because parents occasionally rely on the step parent to do the parenting. That means you are living your son with a complete stranger who happens to be the new parent of your baby.
Sometimes you may get lucky and things will go very smoothly
But what if your child falls on the hand of very bad people.
The thing is you will never have the power to control that after you sign the paper to divorce your wife/husband.
So take a very good look at your baby before you even think about divorcing your spouse.
3. Play bad Politics:
Children will be filled with two extremely radical points of views that cannot be reconciled together. That is the views and opinions of both parents for each other after they got divorced.
Children would find it extremely difficult to even understand their parents on such matters.
Parents would simply feed children with the wrong information that is actually developed to defend themselves against any blames on their actions.
In other words, parents blame their spouses for many things that children would find it very difficult to love and respect their parents.
I would say such kind of actions taken by parents can damage the relationship between children and parents.
Therefore, such kind of allegations and comments mad
by the parents have a huge impact to make or destroy a relationship between a son a father or a daughter and a mother.
If in case we found ourselves under such circumstances, please let us not blame others for our mistakes and it won’t good any good for anybody especially for our children.
Instead let us be filled with love and forgiveness no matter what our past experience looks like and don’t not allow ourselves going through blaming our ex-spouse for the things s/he did to us decades ago since doing so won’t do any good for our children.
It is just bad politics that has a significant damage on the psychology of our children.
In conclusion, let us always find a way to stay away from all the troubles and conflicts that could result in a separation of our family by divorce.
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. If we obey him and fear his with all our strength and power, we will always find ourselves doing well for the sake of our family.
Next time when you even think about divorce, think about the vow you have made to your spouse as the Lord was the witness between you and your spouse.
If you honor your word, the Lord will honor his word and bless you with long life and happy family and you will see your children grow-up in the house of God and honor his with all their heart.
If you break your word that you make to your spouse, you will find yourself short of the glory and blessing of God and your life will not be as pleasant.
So the choice is ours. As for me I would choose to honor him by keeping my word I make to my spouse to love her till death separate us!
May God bless you and may his face shine up on you and gives you abundance of grace to walk on any pitfalls you may find yourself in to in your marriage, in the name Jesus!